I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I currently don't understand fingers.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
