so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
