Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
