with your own penis?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
