So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Vodka?
Forever.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Randomize
