He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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