I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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