Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Randomize
