The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
