my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Of course I have a pirate flag
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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