Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
