there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
she was so not down for the gang bang
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
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