did you get engaged???
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
