david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
