You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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