we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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