What did we do last night that was yellow?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
i dont even know how to be here
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
