Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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