Your dad touched me again.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
