omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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