people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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