I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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