I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
