fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
