So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
my liver is dry heaving
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
