ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
