Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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