Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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