I hate your face
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Randomize
