if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize
