my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
