your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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