he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
