I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
