what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
