She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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