i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize