More tranny stories later!
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
