wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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