the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
