He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
no you cant smoke seaweed
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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