that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize