you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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