ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
