If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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