had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Randomize
