had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
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