Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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