pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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