i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
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